tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84062406808442461002011-11-27T16:02:10.506-08:00Blathering On About My Breast CancerC.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.comBlogger481100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-76580501613507048102011-07-28T19:09:00.001-07:002011-07-28T19:19:44.393-07:00

Well, I'm back. Only to leave again. But that's a good thing. Life calls.If you've just arrived for the first time and are curious or starting your own cancer journey, I recommend starting with the first post in June of 2009 and scrolling upward from there. If you need someone to talk to about your diagnosis, please feel free to email me at: cmicheleharris(at)gmail(dot)comMy final entry on this

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-29007657821612529012009-12-09T08:37:00.000-08:002009-12-09T09:05:08.901-08:00

Nearly healed from surgery at long last. Days after I wrote my last post, I grew another infection. Fever, chills, rashes at my incision sites. We’re all walking bacteria farms, but I appear to be an entire continent. Out of the four surgeries I’ve had in my life, three earned me a painful infection. My doctor’s take? “Maybe you should be done having surgeries.” Sobering. That fat graft from my

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-87849603564930145562009-11-15T12:21:00.001-08:002009-11-15T13:10:39.103-08:00

Prepare to click away dear reader if you don’t want to know the ins and outs. But before you go, first let me tell you this. The next time you are a patient, remember to take as much control of your care as possible. It doesn’t mean be difficult, but rather challenge your doctors, ask for the outcome you wish to see. More often than not, they like the break in monotony. I told my plastic surgeon

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-84511716400052662232009-11-09T19:29:00.000-08:002009-11-09T19:32:44.870-08:00

Don't know what's left to say about being deconstructed over the course of a year. So I'm posting work from my friend Mary Logue, mystery novelist and poet extraordinaire. She always sums it up neat and clean and beautiful at the same time. EXPOSEDWhen you reach the longest day,first day of summer and perfect,the air clear and dry,the wind making all the flowersnod at you again and again,when you

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-80447349652705828232009-10-29T08:12:00.000-07:002009-10-29T08:39:24.841-07:00

Almost as soon as I spewed out that last post, my energy picked up and my outlook brightened. Perhaps I had turned a corner with my cold/flu thing, perhaps I experienced an out-gassing of hormones or perhaps the very act of writing was a sort of sloughing off the bad juju. Anyway, I feel good. But that post remains for anyone to see and assume I’m in tatters. I guess if I want to honestly

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-46479844736243519962009-10-27T10:12:00.000-07:002009-10-29T18:20:51.780-07:00

Last week I was up in the middle of the night, tossing blankets, stripping off my shirt and distancing myself from the various heat sources in our bed, and I began to think how un-depressed I was, how the other shoe had not dropped. We were dealing with my medical issues, had absolutely no work, living in a house filled with dust and exhaust from basement construction, the weather had gone all

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-7482028892338701192009-10-10T08:15:00.000-07:002009-10-10T09:05:54.375-07:00

Big Ass Needle and I had our second date on Thursday. We met in the “big comfy” chemo chair this time. There was a man in the adjoining room, receiving his chemo, watching a baseball game. I gazed out the window at the eclectically manicured Cancer Center gardens, imagining all those who had sat in this chair before and received something more toxic. It didn’t hurt as much this time, the nurse

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-27674422927971083882009-09-15T10:53:00.000-07:002009-09-15T12:09:27.722-07:00

Today I had an appointment with the OB who delivered our twins (as well as removed a humungo fibroid first so that Cheryl could carry those twins). His focus is generally fertility but we trust him and he’s a crack surgeon. He’s conducted over 600 procedures since our last visit.After much discussion and an in depth exam, we decided on a hysterectomy in November. The Zoladex may shrink the

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-32331184107245056162009-09-10T10:50:00.000-07:002009-09-10T10:55:38.931-07:00

So, I’ve been on the Tamoxifen for a few weeks now and am starting to see the effects. Headaches aren’t that bad but I am a little weepy. It’s as if a yearning John Barry soundtrack is playing in the background. Anything will set me off. Oliver caught a cicada today and tortured it. Waaaaaa! Kids pick up that playdough, or I'll, I'll, waaaaa!Also, my fibroid is beginning to radiate a constant

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-25976859552460268952009-09-09T18:51:00.000-07:002009-09-09T18:53:28.148-07:00

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-24381647992611755132009-08-13T13:26:00.001-07:002009-08-13T13:34:22.089-07:00

Okay, bad news first. I got a friggin’ staph infection from my surgery. So my doc switched me to malaria grade antibiotics to kill that. Ick.But the good news is my Oncotype results show that #1: My cancer recurrence is slim. And #2: It probably would have been resistant to chemo anyway. So no chemotherapy! Who-hoo! I fell into a category below even the shaggy grey area and would have only gained

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-77910074095539270752009-08-12T09:24:00.000-07:002009-08-12T18:29:10.961-07:00

There's no point in waiting until I'm cured to start banging the drum about cancer awareness, prevention and research funding. The American Cancer Society has all the details and it isn't always about forking over cash. Sometimes it's about volunteering. Which means a Web site or two in Carbon Creative's future.There's another cause bears mentioning and that's becoming a donor. At this point in

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-91815265311964837012009-08-12T09:04:00.000-07:002009-08-12T09:06:32.089-07:00

Madeline has been behaving oddly. It coincides with my illness and the start of kindergarten so we assume either one or both are the cause. About a month ago she began confessing all the possible things she'd done wrong. "Hun, I got paint on my pants." or "Hun, I dropped a booger on the floor."At first it was sweet. And we thanked her for telling us. Then it became a little wearisome. "Hon, I

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-14552504422387258602009-08-10T15:38:00.001-07:002009-08-10T16:08:25.111-07:00

Been trying to live my life again, the way it used to be. Playing slowly-moving-target to the kids' waterballoons and scanning the art fair for free junk. On Thursday night, Cheryl and I hung out with the guys. On Saturday night, we hung out with the gals. Yesterday, I got to ride 26 glorious miles. 'Course, this illness thing keeps wanting to tussle. Over the past few days, a section of my scar

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-70154570160820009182009-08-05T07:05:00.000-07:002009-08-05T07:15:02.092-07:00

DISPATCHER: Metro 911, what's the address of the emergency?WOMAN: I'm locked in my car, my battery's shut down—DISPATCHER: You're locked in your car.WOMAN: Yes, I can't . . . my power's shut down on my car.DISPATCHER: Uh, huh.WOMAN: And I'm starting to hyperventilate. I'm starting to freak out!DISPATCHER: Now ma'am, you think your battery died?WOMAN: Yeahhhhh.DISPATCHER: So, okay, and you tried

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-19468820317034186452009-08-04T09:17:00.000-07:002009-08-05T07:19:44.307-07:00

Re-read the first part of Lance Armstrong’s memoir last night. I had picked it up a few years back when I was racing and hoped to somehow absorb his skills (negligible results, by the way). This time I was more interested in his battle with cancer, which involved an orchiectomy (testicle removal), brain surgery, high doses of chemo and another painful surgery to remove his chemo pump. That he won

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-49931215494040064732009-07-28T19:05:00.001-07:002009-07-29T13:15:40.396-07:00

It’s clear now that I made the right decision to go with immediate reconstruction. (BTW, this WHOLE post will be about boobs, so look away if you hate boobs) I can still wear most of my shirts and see some shape and know that others see that too, even if my friends know how I got it. Is that the way it should be? Should we give so much importantce to breast size? Future generations will probably

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-5949547996053007742009-07-27T09:19:00.000-07:002009-07-27T09:32:13.969-07:00

After chemo, I will need to go on Tamoxifen for five years to shut down the baby maker. However, the drug brings its own set of side effects and risks that aren’t too swell. The most immediate being that Tamoxifen increases uterine lining, making the fibroid I have now grow another head or arms or possibly uterine cancer. So I might be looking at a hysterectomy somewhere after chemo and before

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-80475015266297495682009-07-23T11:28:00.001-07:002009-07-23T12:12:43.848-07:00

Six months ago, if you had told me I had Stage I breast cancer there would have been a gnashing of teeth, a rending of garments. But today, when my oncologist confirmed my prognosis as a Stage I out of IV (4 means spread to other organs), I was actually pleased.Together with my oncologist, Cheryl and I visited adjuvantonline.com and entered my information. Tumor size, receptor types, age, health,

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-84620198370192607402009-07-22T13:19:00.000-07:002009-07-22T13:25:08.544-07:00

Vicodin withdrawal has left me itchy and restless. And actually that’s a good thing. I don’t need near as much sleep and I’m actually getting work done. I took off on my ’89 chrome Robinson BMX this afternoon and headed down the Greenway trail to see if my pecs could handle it. No problemo! Rode up this beautiful bridge.I had on an old, baggy T and, boy, was the wind through it sublime. Wept

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-83151033383589364992009-07-20T11:14:00.000-07:002009-07-20T11:27:09.005-07:00

Yes, it's true. I have officially allowed ads on my blog. I'm not sure what the ethical ramifications are of exploiting ones breast cancer for profit. Guess we'll have to see what sorts of ads pop up. The proper thing would be to donate all funds to defeating cancer. But first I need to defeat my own and contribute to Carbon manor's coffers. Please commenters, let me know if the ads become

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-35191097958658918952009-07-16T13:51:00.001-07:002009-07-22T14:07:55.696-07:00

(Okay, I did say that I wasn’t going to post anything until next week. But I just drank a lot of coffee. So...)Just about every patient tortures themselves with the above question. It’s very silly on one level, as the deed (if there was one) is done. And too, because many cancers defy the “why” question. But the diagnosis does shock introspection into you like one of those freaky movie close-ups

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-58046257621419049152009-07-16T12:58:00.000-07:002009-07-16T17:53:33.681-07:00

Item #1: No vicodin today!Miraculously without a 12-step program. Yet.Item #2: Entire dentist office now alerted to my boob dramaI am shameless in my quest for attention. Admittedly, I needed that cleaning to have bacteria removed before chemo, but since they were asking …Item #3: Tri-cycle! Tri-cycle!Cher chaperoned me on a bike ride today on Rita’s three-wheeler recumbent. Smirks from other

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-46171272425467586922009-07-10T17:47:00.000-07:002009-07-10T17:49:59.516-07:00

Though my mind’s floating on pharmaceuticals and my chest is strung tighter than a Stradivarius, most of me is up and running just fine. Our homelife seems to have righted itself. Not too many chores piling up or calls from friends left unanswered. Cheryl’s stress is lessening a bit. The dogs scamper and play throughout the house and yard, then come to nest on my lap. Sometimes I sit on the

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-41700794072538804082009-07-08T12:04:00.000-07:002009-07-20T15:36:57.144-07:00

So I dodged a needle aspiration at yesterday’s plastic surgeon appointment. During the exam, I kept my big trap shut, eyes wandering the room, while the doc assessed the amount of swelling. No sense volunteering, right? Cheryl was in on it too, knowing how freaked I was at getting a needle inserted into an already painful area. Still, I’d prepared for the appointment with a percoset and ativan

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-83590798038630422602009-07-06T13:19:00.000-07:002009-07-06T13:21:59.473-07:00

Gildna Radner really knew a thing or two, didn’t she?Just when I thought this new chest was done making trouble I had to go and overexert myself. The nurse who removed my drains said not to go out and ride my bike. Fine, right? She said nothing about a little light yard work, fireworks administration and a trip to Chino Latino.This morning I had to face the fact that my chest is swollen more than

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-85782154138096577272009-07-02T18:26:00.000-07:002009-07-02T18:30:59.822-07:00

One of the annoying aspects of a mastectomy are the drains. And long after you’re up and about and pretending to be fine, they simply hang around waiting to be emptied. A mixture of blood and serum must exit the surgery site, otherwise it would be catastrophic. My first encounter with the drain was in the hospital, still high on anesthesia so much that the atmosphere was green and spotted. I

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-53720136779275813742009-07-01T13:15:00.001-07:002009-07-01T14:04:03.669-07:00

Michele had another rough night but she is feeling better this afternoon. Thanks for all of your kind words and laughs. We told the painter/mace story to her parents today. Michele laughed so hard that it hurt. Thanks a lot Todd! She still doesn't feel up to blogging so I thought I would fill in a few details. Michele had a couple of drains attached after the surgery. She will provide more detail

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-64973259343774583392009-06-29T14:50:00.001-07:002009-06-29T15:06:01.095-07:00

Michele isn't feeling great. She doesn't really feel up to blogging but I wanted to keep all of you informed on her progress. The last couple of days have been filled with fever and queasiness. Her healing is right on schedule. I changed her dressing today and everything looked great. She's a bit emotionally discouraged though. I need your help. I've been trying to make her laugh but apparently

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-36972433392074703272009-06-27T09:50:00.000-07:002009-06-27T09:51:47.100-07:00

By now it’s probably clear that I’m a fan of the metaphor. It can be annoying, I know, but it’s how I often make sense of things. Last night I had a dream that I was walking on a snow covered path in the rural area I used to live. Two small grey wolves had picked up my scent and were pacing me. When I turned to them, they lunged. The teeth of one wolf grazed my neck. I reached out for both of

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-60771110132635701582009-06-26T18:01:00.000-07:002009-06-26T18:30:35.288-07:00

Michele came home today. It was a stressful day with many highs and lows. When we received the pathology report we were both floored. It confirmed that she really dodged a speeding bullet. I will let her explain more when she feels up to posting but long story short, both of her breasts were filled with two different types of cells that are known to develop into breast cancer. Had they not found

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-7129312185239913942009-06-25T13:08:00.000-07:002009-06-25T13:46:43.179-07:00

Michele has mentioned the irony of walking into the hospital feeling healthy to get a life saving treatment that makes you feel awful. She went from easily speeding through her 16 mile bike loop to finding a walk to the nurses station exhausting. She's having a good day, feeling the pain but staying on top of it. She's tired, but feeling positive and appreciative that the cancer was caught before

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-65721229413092943042009-06-24T14:13:00.000-07:002009-06-24T14:23:10.821-07:00

Michele is still in surgery but I just spoke to her surgeon. They took out two sentinel lymph nodes and both looked clear. We will have full results on Friday but she said that doesn't tend to change. This means they did not remove the rest of her lymph nodes (one of her biggest fears), no radiation (another big fear) and the cancer does not look like it spread to other areas of her body (the

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-45941320895342663132009-06-24T11:26:00.000-07:002009-06-24T11:58:10.987-07:00

The surgery is underway. It is going to be longer than we expected, probably four to five hours. Michele was very tense but she did manage to find humor in the fact that she will come out of the surgery blue. Apparently not a very attractive shade of blue from the dye they use to test her lymph nodes.Michele is a happy and unusually positive person. The drugs they give her seem to really magnify

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-42070033763758831942009-06-24T08:22:00.001-07:002009-06-24T08:22:56.649-07:00

Feels like there’s a storm on the other side of this day. Gotta let go of Cheryl’s hand and walk into it. I’m not too proud to admit this “warrior” is oscillating between resignation and terror at the hours, weeks and months ahead.A team of doctors will soon take the first (and most important) action to save me. You can’t get out of such an experience without being humbled to your core. We are

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-44564777180918550052009-06-23T07:32:00.000-07:002009-06-23T07:34:32.272-07:00

My rock through all this is of course Cheryl. She’s been at every appointment since that first biopsy. There is a definite upside to co-dependency.The downsides are times like that first weekend after the diagnosis—two cold, rainy days of us contemplating the end of all we’ve built together and our poor kids. What a wonderful reprieve it was the following Monday when we discovered that my lymph

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-44288753392763598392009-06-22T06:48:00.000-07:002009-06-22T07:01:19.449-07:00

Just realized I switch to second person when writing about things I haven’t quite got my head around: “If you want nipples, they will fashion them for you...” And when it’s something I don't want to face without Cheryl it becomes first person plural: “Friday we meet with a plastic surgeon...”Along those same lines of mini-denial, I let the doctors and staff call me by my first name. They read my

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-67446382680126106292009-06-19T14:28:00.000-07:002009-06-19T14:36:20.293-07:00

Lots of odds and ends. The most important news is my surgery, scheduled for Wednesday. And with that, I must drop all worry about my lymph nodes, the big unknown. Time to let it go.We visited with the oncologist yesterday and that went well. It was tough to tour the oncology wing of the cancer center still with breasts and hair, and nod to those in various stages of their chemo process. The

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-76042324658590833402009-06-17T18:49:00.000-07:002009-06-17T18:56:19.078-07:00

Forgot to mention: My chest x-ray and blood work looked good.Also, the HER2 results on my primary lump came back negative. If the result had come back as HER2 positive it would indicate a cancer that tends to grow and spread faster. So those results are looking good.

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-58903304555036076572009-06-17T14:53:00.000-07:002009-06-17T15:10:51.462-07:00

Back from reconvening with my surgeon since yesterday’s news. Looks like a double mastectomy. Paraphrasing her, “Clearly, your breasts want to make cancer, it’s probably just a matter of time before you develop another cancer in one or both.” So the choice has been made for me, it’s no longer a question of possibly sparing my breasts. And, imagine, if I had not had that follow-up ultrasound and

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-80051510269866878472009-06-16T13:38:00.000-07:002009-06-16T13:55:42.999-07:00

Got the results of yesterday's biopsy ahead of schedule. It appears I have a whole 'nother kind of cancer. Lobular. Good news is this lump is smaller and less aggressive than my first lump (ductile). Plus it is in the same quadrant, meaning they might both be taken at once in a lumpectomy.However (there's always a however), lobular cancers tend to develop in both breasts, meaning my right might

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-22592227620521727312009-06-15T13:40:00.000-07:002009-06-15T14:49:22.347-07:00

Had a lovely weekend, taking care of odds and ends, hanging with the peeps, getting strong. We’re in a much better place here at Carbon manor. Cheryl and I are slowly clueing the kids in on what’s ahead. We want them to be able to ask questions but we also don’t want to overwhelm them. They start kindergarten this fall and it needs to be as stress-free as possible. Madeline was concerned kids

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-74213773493070371712009-06-11T08:21:00.000-07:002009-06-12T07:49:14.290-07:00

Back from the follow-up ultrasound. As they had warned me (many times), the ‘problem’ with an MRI is that it really lights up all manner of concerns. Ultimately this is a good thing because you need to find everything. My right breast remains clear, which is good if I’m aiming for lumpectomy. My left breast, which already contains the cancer, does have other areas they want to biopsy. But there

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-65755340313333939112009-06-10T12:47:00.000-07:002009-06-10T12:58:29.605-07:00

Radiation Therapy consult today at the cancer center. And so finally everything is clear. As mud. Each time I try to sit down to blog, I start going off on a tangent. If it takes several consults to understand this stuff, how could I possibly bottom line it here?The primary conversation here at Carbon manor is lumpectomy vs. full mastectomy. It’s probably just a distraction from larger fears, but

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-33314579365138676872009-06-08T15:05:00.000-07:002009-06-08T15:23:15.210-07:00

I'll try to make this brief and post in more detail as I process the information. But what I'm looking at for sure is:Lumpectomy to remove 2.1 cm (level 2-3 out of 3) invasive ductile carcinomaChemotherapy protocol to destroy any cells that may be elsewhere in my bodyRadiation on the breast to destroy any cells that may have migrated in the breastOn friday, I have one more ultrasound to confirm

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-64512709958014493892009-06-07T08:11:00.000-07:002009-06-12T07:56:01.747-07:00

I already had an MRI for my knee a couple years ago, and while it was disturbingly loud, the anxiety was misplaced. They’re really no big deal if you can ride out the noise and claustrophobia. That one was only over my lower body anyway. So, when Judy told me I would need one because my breasts were so dense that a mammogram and even ultrasound were not enough, I was like hey, whatever, let’s do

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-58856567578360563272009-06-06T06:50:00.000-07:002009-06-06T08:17:16.840-07:00

I listed those three words as my least favorite a few days ago on Facebook, still cavalier, still in denial. The least I had to worry about was a needle. Here I'd always thought of myself as a keen observer of the world around me and the people I know. But I'm myopic to what's going on at close range. It isn't until I get some time and distance before I realize what I said, or was said to me or

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8406240680844246100.post-88642163355831556442009-06-05T20:32:00.000-07:002009-07-27T09:47:51.694-07:00

Today, Judy (lovely woman) from the Breast Center called to let me know I have invasive ductile carcinoma. My friend Laura says I should journal it. So, here goes. Want to walk down the path with me?Upcoming:Needle Core BiopsyAll fun and games until the radiologist looks at the screen.My First Breast MRISounds like Fatboy Slim at a berzillion decibels.The PrognosisFind out when I do.

C.M. Harrishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16205806426533761162noreply@blogger.com2